sunset from behind the wire

sunset from behind the wire

Monday, July 24, 2017

Monday Memes

He's Back

This is a subtle and sensitive look at the important issues in the news. You may have other favorites and while that's nice, this is my blog...so it begins with 'the Juice', so loved by the inner city that they gave him a walk. Yes, it was a jury of his peers.


If it had been a jury of my peers, it would have turned out differently for the rich and famous celebrity murderer who may end up marrying one of the Kardashian daughters. It would make me watch their show in hopes of seeing nature take its course. No, just kidding, I wouldn't waste my time.

When you take a moment to reflect, OJ is responsible for the rise of the Kardashians. Is he also responsible for tranny daddy? I don't know about that but I'm sure that he learned some neat tricks in prison.


The Funeral

Why does funeral food always taste as if they'd picked it up at the homeless kitchen down the street? 

I attended a funeral last week (briefly - showed my face during the snack portion and then left) to make sure that a person who I didn't like when alive was genuinely dead

Because I missed the viewing some aunt or old mistress showed me a photo of the deceased laying in his box and asked me, "Didn't they make him look lifelike?" 

I told the old bat that he never looked that good when he was alive. He had all of the virtues that I found annoying and none of the vices that I admire.

Should I spray Round-Up on the grass over his coffin? I'm just thinking about it at this point. Remember that this is the kinder and gentler LL now.

Maybe piss would be more appropriate - if less effective - unless it's a LOT of piss. Or perhaps a blend of urine and Round-Up, finding the best of both worlds and combining them in a spray bottle. When people remark on how the grass won't grow over his grave, I'm sure that I'll have some pithy comment about it - along the order of the Devil snatching his toxic soul and leaving the waste container behind.

Selling the House

I don't know why it's like that, but it is. 

Sand People are completely predictable, and they're moving into the neighborhood (in numbers). Everyone who has had to deal with the rug drivers has similar stories to tell. Mine is not the only Sand People drama.

Hillary wanted to import a lot more of them. Trump put the brakes on in a move to Make America Great Again. God bless President Trump.


The New Press Secretary

I keep wanting to ask Anthony Scaramucci if he can do the fandango.  I'll bet he gets that a lot.



22 comments:

  1. LL,
    Why did you go to the funeral?

    To pay your respects/ or to be sure?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You have to be sure. I'm still not convinced because I wasn't able to put a needle through the guys eye as he laid there in the coffin. Maybe 95% sure.

      Delete
  2. Come on LL,

    Nicole and Ron were killed by drug dealers as part of the Ricky Ross-Guns for Nicaragua deal. Just later.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're an OJ denier...

      Orenthal J. was framed by the white man.

      Delete
    2. ll,

      The brown man, probably illegal aliens, unless it was mooselimb heroin dealers

      Delete
    3. Gotta think outside the box, you know a bit about the heroin trade,

      Delete
  3. I love the Round-Up idea. I had an ex-sister-in-law who was married to a mob wanna-be who was shot and killed by his doctor... Anyway, at his funeral it was like a mob movie. A bunch of shark-skinned suites who kept reaching under their coats when a car drove up. The BIL was buried with his nice watch and rings on. A month later, my SIL was told his grave was dug up and all his bling was gone. They asked her if she wanted to come and identify the body before they reentered him. She said, "Hell no! Just plant him deeper." She was not one of his fan's either.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's good that your ex-sister-in-law's husband is dead. The story about the doctor shooting him would be grist for a great blog post...(hint)

      Delete
    2. >shot by his doctor
      Sometimes "primum non nocere" is superceded by "That said, there are some assholes in the world that just need to be shot."

      Delete
    3. Shot and killed. Just shot leaves the opening for a skilled surgeon (like you) to fix the damage.

      Delete
    4. Much as I appreciate it, you're giving me credit I don't deserve -- I'm no surgeon, not even close. Nearest thing I did was taking out a gallbladder (laproscopically) as a medical student while the attending surgeon stood next to me watching every move. And that opportunity wasn't because I was good; I'm pretty sure it was because the attending wanted to humiliate the surgical resident on the team by letting the mere student supercede her.

      Delete
  4. Don't try that joke on Scaramouche. It's like asking a tall guy, "how's the weather up there?". I'm sure he's heard it enough to be sick of it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, and he's short so there is a likelihood that he'd bite my kneecaps.

      Delete
  5. Never thought of the RoundUp trick. When somebody I don't give a hoot about dies, I give fewer hoots and purge them from the memory bank.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We'll all end up with a mouth full of dirt. The benediction to life is important, though. Most of us want to leave something meaningful behind. Some just leave injured people and destruction behind. Those people need the Round-Up on the grass.

      Delete
  6. O.J. Back in the day had lots of contacts with the King County (WA) LEOs. Some were in L.A. trading info on serial killers (a WA State specialty, it seemed) and there was discussion about Nicole Simpson/Ron Goldman. The L.A. detectives were livid the DA office went ahead before their investigation was complete. Per the kinds of knife wounds, they were convinced there were two assailants. Politics and P.R. vs good police work.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. One of my ham radio buddies was a Medical Examiner for the Coroner. He was on the team that examined the bodies, and said the damage done to them was "horrific". Nicole's head was a few millimeters away from being completely severed, and the other wounds were extremely deep. The team came to the conclusion that whoever did that to her was filled with hate and rage.

      Delete
  7. Re OJ, who frikkin cares? He'll screw up and be back in prison in a year or less... Re the other, trust but verify comes to mind... Just sayin.

    ReplyDelete
  8. You make a very good point. OJ caused Cait. Hunh.

    Thanks for the Churchill.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My inner Churchill sustains me in such moments.

      Delete
  9. "Sand People", got to love it. I won't type what they're called here, but then I'll bet you can guess.

    ReplyDelete

It's virtual - it's a mirage - it's life