Monday, April 1, 2013

Duck Dynasty (Series Review)

West Monroe, Ouachita Parish, Louisiana


Jigging frogs, hunting ducks, killing beaver and killing more beaver, hunting hawgs, catching crawfish, fishing for catfish, avoiding gators, dodging snakes and in their spare time they make duck calls. A lot of duck calls. And The Robertson Family made millions and millions of dollars. Welcome to the reality of Duck Dynasty.

I'm not big on beards and long hair. And I'm not from Louisiana the way my friend WoFat is. However, it would seem that they have a lot more fun than I do.

One of the biggest criticisms that can be levied is "too many days in the subdivision". It passes for curse words in the Louisiana swamps.

Counseling: "Find yourself a meek, gentle, kind spirited country girl. If she she knows how to cook and she carries her Bible to live by and she loves to eat bullfrogs -- now THERE is a woman." "Women are like Labrador Retrievers. They all have quirks." 

(Daddy) Phil: Started the duck call business. Works on developing his grandchildren into genuine
human beings. "The Michael Jordan of duck hunting."

(Mamma) Kay: Runs the household. Cooks squirrels (likes the brains best), catfish and frogs like a chef. Brooks no B. S. "You bring home the game or you aren't a man." Collects things... (hoarding tendencies)

Uncle Si:   Several tours in Viet Nam. Relates most things to that formative experience. "I am the MacGyver of cooking. If you bring me a piece of bread, cabbage, coconut, mustard greens, pigs feet, pine cones...and a woodpecker, and I'll make you a good chicken pot pie."

Willie:  Attended University of Louisiana, CEO, has less fun than the others because he runs the business. Hot wife (Korie). Built the duck call business into the dynasty. "Willie is as wound up as a coon dog trying to pass a peach pit." - Jase

Jase (Willie's brother): Duck call assembler and family member. Focuses on shooting and playing but manages some creative ideas. Hot wife (Missy) "Having your brother as your boss is like dating your cousin. It's a bit weird." He's the artist of duck call design.

Jep (Willie's other brother): Married to Jessica (also a hot wife)

Johnny Godwin: Employee and friend.

Jimmy Red: Family friend and employee

Mountain Man: Doesn't work there and hangs out.

Martin: Employee
"You can talk any redneck into a challenge. That's why so many rednecks die in strange ways." -Jase Robertson